QUOTE (Gattsu @ Nov 21 2006, 03:25 PM)sar no flaming wich is alot diffrent thean when ppl start this convo on other forums....
Well, this is a rather special lot I think. And we have good moderators which help us remember our manners.
QUOTE but the points are very valid but as with my freand he onyl a few select freand and his perent were dead
A pity. And I say that honestly. However, your friend has (had?) two choices. He can succumb to circumstances, or he can rise above them. You understand the point, I hope. Your fate is your choice. You only have no hope left when you have abandoned all of it. And you have nothing left to live for only when you have abandoned your humanity.
Circumstances have a strange way of changing, given time and effort. Relationships can be built. We can find things worth having, worth living for.
QUOTE in my case i just dont care about anyone but me cos i am selfish but anyhoos i found tha tthe only thing holding me back was fear of pain other than that nothing was wrong
You sure? I hope you don't really mean it. I agree that all of us are selfish to varying degrees. But I rather think you probably do care about others more than you are admitting here.
There doesn't have to be pain in suicide, you know. Some ways are quite painless. An overdose of sleeping medicine, for example, or carbon monoxide poisoning.
So why don't we just do it? There has to be a deeper reason. Even if we won't admit it to ourselves or to others, there is a will to live even when there seems no reason to. We cannot keep ourselves from hoping that the future will bring better things.
And it usually does. It requires some work and effort. Your circumstances will not change without your input. But if you are willing to become better than what you are, you can make changes that will enhance your sense of a meaningful life.
QUOTE (warita200 @ Nov 21 2006, 03:21 PM)QUOTE (rtgmath @ Nov 21 2006, 02:45 PM) The problem with suicide is that your actions never affect you only, but others as well. In that way, suicide is an ultimately selfish action.
Hummmm, interesting notion. I have been told this many times before.... and... you know what? If a person is already so desperate that he/she considers suicide, then that person should not think about his relatives. Sure they will be sad.... but is that really a reason to continue unbearable suffering?
As I have grown older, I have found that my perspectives on "unbearable" and "suffering" have changed over time.
For example, one of my sons got angry with me recently. He chaffed under a decision I made he did not like, and being one to store up grievances, he said hurtful things and declared that life was unbearable. He can get fiercely angry and insist that any disagreement with him means being completely unreasonable. Mind you, he is a lot better than he was years ago. And in my youth I was much life him temper-wise. The things I found unbearable in my youth I found later on were called "life's inconveniences." Yes, even some severe medical problems.
Indeed, after a few hours of sulking, he relinquished his anger and got better. I have worried about him on occasion. The more angry he gets the more profound the depression that follows. And medicating depression in youth is risky. Some medications like Paxil and Zoloft are actually associated with increased suicide risk in adolescents.
And I am confident my son will change his perspective over time. I have tried to be careful not to ignore signs of medically-significant depression. We are all depressed at times. I have had one episode that lasted for probably about a year.
QUOTE My brother tried to commit suicide almost 2 years ago and it is a miracle he is alive. He jumped 30 meters and survived it.... his legs were totally shattered and he injured his spine. BUT HE CAN WALK!!! yes, it is a miracle.
And those 2 hours after we found his letter and before we found him were the longest in my life. You know, I think it was a sign from heaven, because I have always thought about suicide ever since I was a little kid and now I got to see what it is like to do such a thing, just that it wasnt ME.
It was heartbreaking to see my mother and it was hard for us all..... but what startled me the most is.... that my bro has done it the same way like I have always imagined to do it. I am glad that I dont have any strong depressions anymore.... but I sure can understand those, who dont see any sense in their lifes and who choose the ultimate solution. Their life, their choice.
Depression, by its very nature, keeps us from seeing the real truth about our circumstances. I am also glad you don't suffer from strong depression any more, but should you do so, admit it to someone and get some help. Other mental illness needs to be recognized and treated. Much of it can be effectively treated.
I hope also that your brother will find life increasingly worth living. Peace to you and yours.
Regards,
