Living someone elses' dream?

Hmm....well I've been very thoughtful about this topic for a while, so I thought I'd add it in:

Sometimes it perplexes me because I fail to understand the logic of life. I mean, you try your hardest to find the good things in life, but it is so difficult in today's age and time to find those things. What really bugs me is that I am living in two different worlds. One, where I am doing what my parents want me to do, study hard, getting that 90 average, be a doctor, making friends with people whom you cannot even consider as your friend because they are so shallow. And then there is this deep, meaningful, even surreal life, where I think and dream, hope and watch anime and imagine things that I know I would never be allowed to do with my career. Ironically, the reason I follow my parents and the world around me is because if I didn't I would be lost, I wouldn't know what to do with my life.

Okay, so basically here is my question, do you think life is taken too seriously? Throughout my life I have been pushed and nudged, be the best, be the best, be successful, make money, be SOMETHING. My question is, why must I be something? Am I nothing now?

Besides being rich and famous, what is there to look at in life, at the end of the day? You catching my flow?

I'd like to hear people's opinion on this topic, or who can relate (or am I just weird like that)

My personal belief and strategy in life is to strive for that feeling of achievement. You know when you work towards something and finally get it, be it that 90% on that math test or finally finish rebuilding that 350 engine out of your truck. It really has nothing to do with anyone else or their opinions. It is just something we do for ourselves, chase the feeling of a job well done and then striving for the next challenge that will give you the same feeling. At least that gives me a purpose in life, it sure makes it interesting at the very least. Nice topic though, can't wait to see other posts on this subject.

Though I'm not yet expanding all my ideas on the subject, I had written something just a few days ago, on the first of March, about what I've seen through 3 years of life after graduating from high school. Now, it's not everything I've experienced or come to learn, just 3 views for the future in an alternative aspect. Each have their own ups and downs in ways to look at things, each have their own hidden aspects for choosing to follow those paths, and each have a description based on my personal view of them, altered to make them all sound interesting to choose. And because I need sleep and rather give my time to try explaining any thoughts I have, I felt like posting this 'story of choices' for any who have 10 years to read it. (when I started typing it originally, it was only supposed to be something quick and small, but with me, I never make things simple and short.. Now, I didn't make it to be a novel, so excuse any grammatical errors or whatever else to criticize outside of the thoughts. )


I was given three roads, if you will accept this method of presenting a story.

The first road, oh so obvious and promising looks existed of this well kept and paved road. Everyone suggested it because it was the obvious choice for a way to follow to what looks like a promising future discovery, and it so may very well be a promise with many possible success stories. Though beginning with light haze and partly cloudy with prospect of rain and thunder midway down the path, should it not be expected in any way you choose to follow? The road is lined with street lamps and there lies the prospect of sunshine thru clear skies once into the city ahead. 'The storm will only last the trip, and I may find shelter along the provided inns and may occasionally find people offering sheltered beds for the nights, but eventually into the city will I find myself where I may choose to stay or advance. Very promising indeed, but the weather and mountain plateaus I must wade thru and climb myself. I cannot ask for them to give me supplies and lead me through everything, I would only be a bother to their community, but at least they have posted road signs and maps for those like me.'

The second road, nearly unseen, for it had not yet, nor does it seem to be planned, for any form of guiding direction into it, and sat there with very little worry for wear of trampling feet. It looked less like a path then an outright adventure into the unknown, if you dare attempted to step a foot and fight a path through it. 'The sky black with the night and fog dense enough to make you go in circles' are what some claim to have seen and dared not step a foot farther beyond the threshold. Yet, to me, it has an ominous feeling of understanding about its general position in front of, instead of behind me, but its future promise for success had shown nothing to me. All that I can visually see for this path is barging into the unknown without knowing where I will end up. 'This path is unknown and seems unnatural, I should dare not take it fear I forever lose myself. If I attempt it, I will need to forge my own path through it to get anywhere.'

The third road, a small width of black asphault ran with lively green grass roots erupting through the weak edges and crawling over. Nearby tree roots dive under and lift the loose, weak-form tar road to greatly alter it once flat form. That road seemed welcoming to a nice, long, lazily formed stroll down to nature's natural growth. Initially, the only proof of civilization once existing is the aged asphault pathway. A near perfect escape for those who wish take the easy, simple and cozy road into the future, giving in to only their quick desires, which later can be proven by the occasional man-made structure, widget, or amateur art found laying beside the road. Greatly relaxing path where I may fulfill all my little wants and desires without being required to do so. There is proof in the sky and on the ground the presence of future varying weather thru of light to heavy rain and partly cloudy skies, but since when is shade and a comforting rain a bad thing? 'I have my own time here, and can make use of it however I want. Aside from foraging for berries and vegetables, hunting for other foods, gathering firewood and providing my own form of temporary shelters as I continue, I can pursue anything else I have been wanting to do and create without the excessive demands of others on my lifestyle.'

The road I chose to start should be even 'most obvious' for those who don't really know me. Has anyone ever really known me though? I have grown to see new possibilities among many choices and offers and find myself on a different road.



And to end on the infamous words of a college friend: "There are some things in life I am willing to risk, like eternal damnation. A parking ticket I am not." - David Sokol
ie. Take risks you see fit to live your life, avoid others you think are uneccesary.
At least, that's one interpretation of his quote.

I may need to explain my point on the quote thing later..if nobody understands my point in saying it.

Sure, my life has a purpose.
My ultimate goal in life is to please God, & hopefully God willing enter Paradise.
Another goal that is up there is finishing college.
A Goal that might be the hardest is to help make the world be a better place, but i'm just one person. there is only so much one person could do. So, at least ill try with people closest to me.

so, I think that nowadays a lot of ppl think that life is supposed be all fun. Well, its not. Life is about responsibility, about making a living and trust me buddy, that is not fun at all. The sooner you understand how life really works, the better for you. Your parents know it, so they try to force you to take decisions that are good for you, because you take your life the luke warm way.
Life is about getting a well paid job, so that you can support a family and afford some of the little things that brighten up the greyness of your everyday life. Once you have become an adult (an independent adult that is) you will see, that life is hard, it is unfair and no matter how much you loved your job at the beginning, after a while routine kills your enthusiasm.

So my advice is..... try your hardest to build a good basis for your future life. Study hard and get a good job. With the money you earn later on you can afford a lot of dreams and be happy later on.

Life is a four letter word with an undefinable meaning. I think it's because different people view life differently. For me it's basically experiencing the different emotions, it could be happiness, sadness, boredom, anger, fear etc. I think they're all part of life and when I experience them, I know that I'm alive.

QUOTE One, where I am doing what my parents want me to do, study hard, getting that 90 average, be a doctor, making friends with people whom you cannot even consider as your friend because they are so shallow.

At first I thought that you were going to be talking about the relationship of Roy and Hughes from Full Metal Alchemist. It had that theme of living someone else's life, which I could relate to, but this example you just shared does make a lot of sense.


QUOTE Okay, so basically here is my question, do you think life is taken too seriously? Throughout my life I have been pushed and nudged, be the best, be the best, be successful, make money, be SOMETHING. My question is, why must I be something? Am I nothing now?

Success is subjective. In my opinion, success has more to do with being true to yourself and being accomplished than it has to do with money.


QUOTE Besides being rich and famous, what is there to look at in life, at the end of the day? You catching my flow?

Right, rich and famous, and then you die. We'll all be buried next to the beggar that we ignored three months ago at the train station.

That's why so many animes are about living for someone else and living life through your children since they carry your memories. I applaud the Japanese directors for figuring out that life shouldn't be wasted on oneself, since there isn't much of a value in selfish accomplishments. I think that they got it half right though.

Now, if only we could toss an afterlife into that equation, then life would have a meaning. There, I said it: Life has no meaning without an afterlife.


QUOTE I'd like to hear people's opinion on this topic, or who can relate (or am I just weird like that)

Don't feel that way, if anyone should be, I think it's me that should be doubting if he's "just weird like that".

la-li-lu-le-lo (anyone knows from where the phrase is quoted from? )

I'm pretty much convinced now that hadji-san is one of my favourite poster in the 'Thoughtful Sections' Short explanations,yet full of meaning.

Well,back to the topic.Most of the posts here have made up pretty much a good point over this matter.So,time for my opinions.(do not read any further if you've have something against the way I'm posting... )

QUOTE (xxanime_junkyxx-san)I'd like to hear people's opinion on this topic, or who can relate (or am I just weird like that) much like what hadji-san has said,it's nothing weird at all xxanime_junkyxx-san. Maybe if we let this thing slip out,life would be a lot more easier,but giving a thought over something is never a bad thing.By wondering,we'll try to get the answer,and by attaining the answer,we can pretty much knows better about ourselves and find a way to live for the better. (cheesy..cheesy...).Well,let's just hope we're getting the right answer to this here.


QUOTE (hadji-san)Success is subjective. In my opinion, success has more to do with being true to yourself and being accomplished than it has to do with money.
True enough.Success is a subjective things,how we view it may differ.


Back to the question?'Living someone elses' dream?'

Well,it depends on each of us.For me,it is something that every of us do.Putting the religious side aside,we actually have no much reason to find by ourselves to keep struggling for the best in our lives.We may rely on others to even giving our lives a meaning.And,didn't we perceive success and happiness based on our interactions and observations on other people?So,you can say from the very beginning,we have live for the sake of others.We may apply other's opinions to form our opinions,isn't that pretty much the same with living someone elses's dream?We adapted the opinions from others,and the one we adapted from may adapted it from others before...I don't know how many of our thought could be considered original...even if we think it is,it maybe just an accumulations on all of our experienced being with others..

The trick is...did we believe in the same things with the one that expecting something out from us?(i.e parents,family).We often find it difficult to live the way they wish us to,probably because we believe in different form of success.We believe we can be something even if we didn't live the way they ask us to.We believe that success shouldn't be percieve in that way only.So that pretty much caused this entire conflict.(well,there's lots more to it,we may object caused we believe we think we're not capable of accomplishing the things and such...etc.etc..)

Still,just having diffrent opinions on how success should be defined,could someone just totally drop on living on how they've been expected on how they should live?Though finding it maybe tricky,actually things in our lives have lots of reasonings.An actions may have lots of reasons mixed behind it.We may not totally agree on the way of lives forced onto us,but some of us still try to live up to the other's dream.Why?It maybe because that 'others' are those who dear so much to them,that fulling their expectations ans seeing their happy face rejoicing over their success bring them much happiness.To these people,even if they didn't live up to their own dreams over a thing,they've already successful in achieving their dream in the other way.In short,they are lots of form to success and happiness.It's just whether we acted up on how we believe that matters. And of course,even if some of us ends up sacrificing our view on a thing by living to other's opinions instead of ourselves,they maybe doing so in order to achieve the other form of success and happiness.It maybe something that couldn't be done at the same thing,so they choose the way they think is the best.

But I believe even if we want to,we can't just left out others in every single things we do.We actually didn't have a total complete authority on our lives.If not for others,we may not even live right now,so they too have some rights on us.Just give them some share on what they deserves from us occasionally.Like hadji-san said "life shouldn't be wasted on oneself, since there isn't much of a value in selfish accomplishments." and yup! That's true.. Just act up on how we believe is the best for all of those involved,because we can do lots of things,but if our reasonings behind its is wicked,there's no meaning to it.Facing lots of hardship is something to be expected,it's only natural for those who lives.
"Life ain't that easy?".......right?

Being happy most of the time doesn't mean the person is leading an easy lives.. The happiness they're having might be the result of lots of hardships,and a good thinking over matters

Agghh.!My head couldn't get anymore thing to be thrown here... Well,I'll add up if I've got something more...

If you've read my post up to this point...then CONGRATULATIONS!Youve been successful on reading my entire nonsense post! Note the word 'success' there...that's one of the success in my point of view (you may think it's a wate of time though...)

Good day then,

p/s:hoping to hear lots of more interesting opinins here..

living some one else's dream? we all do. we base our dreams, desires, wants on people we are close to. i.e: family memebers, close friends. So no matter what we do its based on someone else's ideas and ideals. so rarely do you get an original desire or want. it is because alot of these have already been discovered, it is much like inventing.

Soi, i think most people will take a well lit paved road into the city ahead few take the second road and more than a few would choose the last path. The second path i believe you will find more things but it will take alot of gut and courage to take a step in there. i think if i had to pick i would like to pick the 2nd path. For if i chose the 1st i would be forever wondering what was on the other path. i would never be allowed on the 3rd path so i'm already living someone else's dreams.

two lives.... try ten....I am what i like to call a "sponge" I take in the emotions and expectations of those around me if someone thinks I am smart and charming then poof I am what they think... I dont really know if that is a good trait or not like when i am with my friends and what not and for an example a girl comes up to me and starts small talk i transform to some different person I guess that is just the lonely side of me but I can definately understand where you are coming from anime_junky-san and trust me when I say that you are not alone in this matter definately about the parent thing I am a well rounded military man when I am at home...and yet when I am at a party i am a FREAK! this topic relates to a different question slightly..that being do you act differently arond certain people and I will admit yes i do...but then again everyone does in some way

i've been reading up alot of people's posts here and alot of people here are saying the same thing, that success and life is what you want it to be....well many times that isn't possible, some people don't get that opporunity, then this topic comes in, living someone elses dream...

if people havent noticed then you can tell that im quite bitter about life at the moment, mainly because it is so frustrating and full of pointless things, adults barely treat teens like 'beings'....they still have this belief that we arelittle hooligans wandering around the streets doing drugs! Today in my biology class we had a sub teacher and we were fully talking ABOUT biology, and she says to me and this guy, "you two, stop talking!" and i said, "well we are talking about biology" and then she gives the DIRTIEST look and rolls her eyes and says, "sure you are," and then i got so mad and said, "Well if you want you can come stand beside us and here us talking," and then she replies, "its questionnable"....WTF?! *ugh*....why are there limitations and so many rules placed upon teens these days, they'll obviously rebel against such things.... i dunno, this was a bit off topic, but such stupid and pointless things about life really get me goi ng

QUOTE if people havent noticed then you can tell that im quite bitter about life at the moment, mainly because it is so frustrating and full of pointless things, adults barely treat teens like 'beings'....

Well, my advice is to stay strong for a few more years, then you can join the rest of us young adults here that treat teenagers like apathetic hooligans. =)


QUOTE la-li-lu-le-lo (anyone knows from where the phrase is quoted from? )


The passwords are: "Who are the Patriots?" and "La-li-lu-le-lo."

A reoccuring theme in the Metal Gear Solid series that doesn't seem to have much to do with the topic, then again, I might be mistaken. =p

Im kind of divided over this topic, but here are my two cents anyway

I have wonderful parents who trsut my judgement and know I will do the right thing, even though i stumbled quite badly in studies back in o levelsand found myself having suicide thoughts at times-

i had stopped studying after trying hard a couple of times, just got caught up in life, school--tution-console gaming--not too many friends at that time--by the time i reached home in those days it was 8, hardly anytime left to study or the things taught to be left in my brain---

even in school there was a huge hooliganism, rebel revolution going on, it was the senior classes versus the management, we were all angry bout the lack of facilities , so we were indulging in acts of rebellion with teachers, breaking school stuff, whatnot. The exams were meaningless i thought, it wasnt till a month before the final papers i realized i was in deep deep shit, the final school exam results came out and i was the last in class, just 2% above the failing rate--at that moment i started to study, but it was too late,

i barely passed my Os with a single A, that shattered my illusion on life, makingme understand how important these exams were--cuz of that couldnt apply to any schools--thought about going to government college--but ran away after taking a couple of classes---stuck with A levels, thankfully, fortunately or whatver--there was a jump in pre reqs for schools at the time--some good students also wound up at the a levels college/school i went too, good friends i still hang out with.

tried harder there, but still gaps in maths and stuff left me in a pretty precarious position in studies, a little more fortune came my way, got into a respectable uni---and that coupled with a big family issue which rose up and a love spurned---it all made me decide --on a stormy night, ( yes it really was raining/lightning) -that studies/motivation/dedication...and thats the key.

Awright---Dreams--im one of those kids who grew up wanting to be the good guy, the hero, the jedi, i loved watching transformers, thundercats and all those nostalgic shows, i readily believed even at that time, the hero can do no wrong so i shalt do no wrong--or try too atleast---have a clearer view now--im more of a realist now, good to the good, not revengeful to the bad--bad to the assess..

--->that all inspired me or, or i had just a knock on the head too much during uni days--that i have a my own dream, i never did what my parents wanted me too, i dictated my terms all over, my dad never interfered/ my mom just accepted what i said, i do get a lot logical/confident now about my choices, --

so now, im working on this startup, Metal Seinen---formerly i was head of an anime awareness group, head of city anime community----blah blah----mseinen allows people to realize their dreams, what they always wanted to do but life didnt let them or they didnt have the gut for it---currently i have a presentation soon at a local media training institute, a documentary on the history of film----
projects which mseinen is bound to pick up---its to become the pool for creative talent all over, inspiring others to bring out ideas which others repress and abuse.

Dreams?...man, you just need to have an approach to life, if people think that you are doing crack and you arent, then you must have some image issues, and if you are? stop while you can, and focus on life, family , relationships, your dreams.---

as far as living someone elses dreams goes...it depends, even if you work at a big multinational--wasnt it some other persons dream too?---whats your own?
have you even thought about it?---would you just like to relax and have fun all the time? or would you like to do something people all over would know you for?.

--------->A longer post then i expected, hope that clarifies the approach to such issues as dreams, other peoples dreams, parenting issues---->whatsis.
and if you ever have issues and want to put time in a proj, give me a call/msg

QUOTE (xxanime_junkyxx @ Mar 06 2007, 06:37 PM) why are there limitations and so many rules placed upon teens these days, they'll obviously rebel against such things.... i dunno, this was a bit off topic, but such stupid and pointless things about life really get me goi ng
because we are the generation that will soon rule over them and we will have complete control so to keep us down they constantly "crap" on us to make themselfs feel superior....and yes it pisses me off too like my engilsh teacher in the class i am in right now...she does everything how she wants it and anything else is out of the question...even if you are talking about the current topic with your buddy in class she instantly stops all talking unless it is directed to her...its bullcrap...

QUOTE (Sozo-kun @ Mar 07 2007, 12:44 PM) because we are the generation that will soon rule over them and we will have complete control so to keep us down they constantly "crap" on us to make themselfs feel superior....and yes it pisses me off too like my engilsh teacher in the class i am in right now...she does everything how she wants it and anything else is out of the question...even if you are talking about the current topic with your buddy in class she instantly stops all talking unless it is directed to her...its bullcrap...
is that seriously your opinion?

Why are there rules? Because if there werent any rules, total chaos would break out. Especially young ppl dont know when it is enough, because they lack life experience. And I think it is stupid how teenagers rebel against adults, knowing SHIT and they act as if though they were smarter than their parents.

What on earth makes you think you know more and you know it better than your parents? Is it you or your parents who have over 20 years of solid life experience?

QUOTE Right, rich and famous, and then you die. We'll all be buried next to the beggar that we ignored three months ago at the train station.

Sad, but true.

I agree with hadji, the only way that life would become 'fair' is to put the afterlife in the equation. Knowing this, at least we get to hope for the eternal bliss of Paradise after toiling in this temporary life to get there. That's my two cents.

QUOTE (xxanime_junkyxx-san)if people havent noticed then you can tell that im quite bitter about life at the momentlol,you've said it yourself there xxanime_junkyxx-san,'at the moment'. I've forgot to say this before,but we tends to overview our lives on how we feeling 'at the moment',and can hardly made an overall review if we're in a bad mood.Actually if we're feeling good 'at the moment',it seem this live itself feels like earthly-paradise,and having the thoughts of dying might even scared us,hoping that this happy moments,this lives of ours could go on for eternal.(well,in some cases...)

My point is,just like hadji-san said(I'm really a fan of hadji-san! ),just try to endure it a little bit more(you can let loose sometimes,like what we're doing now,throwing our thinking honestly. ),and when the time passes,and when the situation has changed for the better,our view on everything will be different than from now.That's what life is,'changing'...right?

And don't worry about being the only person with such negative view over lives,because you're not I must say I've gone through the same feelings you've been having,where the adults telling me how should I do things,till in get on my nerves.I even despised those people,thinking 'What?So I'll be nothing if don't do it their way?Am I that fool of a person who can't think for myself at all,that you need to tell me everything?'.Basically,just the same on what you're having right now xxanime_junkyxx-san .But when the time passes,with some happiness flowing into my life,and up and down going on after that,I can now think in a different way of view.I'm more positive on my lives,and by a little bit,i came to understand what the adults trying to tell me and why they do so.Just living is enough,things that's revolving around it are up to us and those around us to shape.

Well,I'm pretty sure you'll be doing fine without me telling you that just want to share a little bit of my experiences. For now,I truly appreciate my life,peoples around me,and all of the precious moment I''ve had for now.Maybe there will be time for me to be thrown again into depression,and all of my good view on lives right now will gone without a trace in my head.But as long as I'm blessed with the opportunity of living,I'll keep living this life until my time runs out.Living on others dream?If that can makes me going through this life,I don't care living on others dream.Whatever the method is,as long as my heart and brain percieve it to brings more good than harm to me and others,I think I'll do it,as long as it can keep me going on with my life.Because I believe,whether happiness and sadness won't be permanent for us.Even if I'm depressed,as long as I lives,that joyful moments and good view on life I've once had will return to me again,and I think that'll worth all of my effort when the time cames,though I maybe could never realised its worth in the process.

I'm quite negative on how I've live my life up to now,but I think I'm not negative on the fact that I live right now.I'm afraid that even by living,I'll bring harm to others,yet,if I'm still given the opportunity of living,I'll keep going on,for the reason I've stated above,and for the fact my life isn't all my own.There's lots of people who hold a share on my life.So if I can't live for myself right now,I can still live for the sake of others,and there'll maybe be time when i can live for myself again as time passes.Human is capable of changing,and maybe I could changed for the better if I continue on living,and even realising that gives me hope.Though I can't be sure I'll really turn out to be the better and become worse instead,but if I'm dead,I'm ruled out from all of that possibilities,so that's why,and that's why,given the opportunity to live more itself is much a blessing,at least IMO.

Living on someone elses' dream wasn't much a big deal when I think about that.Life is full of possibilities,as they say.I may live on someone elses' dream for the moment,but I know if I keep on living,there'll be time when I can live up to my own dream (well,have to work a bit for that! I'm quite a lazy-bum I must say which probably makes what I'm saying above unreliable considering what kind of a person I am! )"time keeps flowing..."...right?

"CHEESEY!TOO CHEESEY d'observer!!!"--I somehow can hear people saying that when they read my nonsense babbling post.

Good day then ,

QUOTE I'm quite negative on how I've live my life up to now,but I think I'm not negative on the fact that I live right now.

I really like how you phrased this. As long as we're alive, there's always time to search for our purpose, ideals, and truth. And when we do find it, we spend the rest of our time living up to it in hopes that it'll ultimately pay off in the end.

QUOTE (warita200 @ Mar 07 2007, 01:26 PM) is that seriously your opinion?

Why are there rules? Because if there werent any rules, total chaos would break out. Especially young ppl dont know when it is enough, because they lack life experience. And I think it is stupid how teenagers rebel against adults, knowing SHIT and they act as if though they were smarter than their parents.

What on earth makes you think you know more and you know it better than your parents? Is it you or your parents who have over 20 years of solid life experience?
I never said that I was smarter than anyone i was saying that the way my teacher runs things is like a dictatorship she has every single piece of power and then she shoves it in our face like a trophy....

QUOTE (d'observer @ Mar 08 2007, 04:51 AM) "CHEESEY!TOO CHEESEY d'observer!!!"--I somehow can hear people saying that when they read my nonsense babbling post.


haha-- now i wonder why?..